A Short Play About The Acquisition Of Snacks

Dave [who has been feeling poorly]: Hey, did you bring me home a muffin I didn’t ask for?
Tara: Dave! This is why I called you before I came home to ask if you wanted anything, and you said no! I was right outside the Amish Market, I could have brought home whatever you wanted!
Dave: I know, but I didn’t want it then.
Tara: Why do you do this EVERY TIME? This isn’t even anticipating Future Dave’s needs, it’s anticipating Present Dave’s needs!
Dave: Geez, sorry.
Tara: You make me feel HORRIBLE when you do this.
Dave: Why? It’s not your fault.
Tara: It FEELS like my fault. I’m doing a bad job taking care of you. But wait, I even gave you another chance! I asked you before I put my pyjamas on! GOD! Why don’t you just learn to like those granola bars, they’re the closest thing to cookies in the house.
Dave: Sorry! I didn’t say anything!
Tara: Why do you always make me feel like a bad wife?
Dave: You take snacks way too seriously.
Tara: Dave. There’s nothing I take more seriously.